Friday, March 9, 2012

" I'm trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacer!!"

Okay friends...
  Its soapbox time again. Or maybe I should say cakebox?? Anyway, I have a bone to pick.

And let me preface this post by first saying... I ADORE cupcakes. I love their sweet little cakey bodies and creamy tops... I love how they have changed the everyday 3 year old birthday party cake cutting and serving chore into a quick and painless everyone gets the same size event.
                                    I loved cupcakes before cupcakes were cool.

That being said, cupcakes dear friends... are Played. Out.
Just look around you. I'm sure you know of at LEAST 2 maybe 3 good cupcakerys in your area... you, like myself probably stop by 2 to 3 times a week  occasionally to grab a tasty cup o joe along with your favorite cake and butter cream combo.  And all that is perfectly fine!! But as Susan Power would say...

If I see one more news broadcast on how Magnolia Bakery ices a red velvet, or a feature on the newest organic vegan space cupcake shoppe I'm going to scream...
And to be honest, all those reasons are NOT why I'm in a tizzy this morning...


Despite my love hate relationship with cupcakes, AND overlooking my pure white hot hatred of Sprinkles Cupcakes in general this machine is an insult.
First... This is NOT 1930 {no matter how much I wish it was} and this NOT a Horn and Hardart Automat... its a cupcake machine, where extra large people with extra large wallets and extra large laziness can just walk up any 24 hours of any day and get for a mere $4 one of the 600 baked fresh daily shitty preservative filled sprinkles cupcakes.

And B... Did I mention laziness?? REALLY AMERICA?? We cant stand to put forth the time and effort to walk into a bakery {preferably one who offers locally grown and supported ingredients} and sit and enjoy a tasty treat?? Instead we will swipe that good old dependable card to become the lucky consumer of a crappy chemically filled cupcake... but god don't we just love that little bulls eye on the top!!

Number 3... Disney Pixars WALL-E should say it all... I'm just sayin

I'm sure there are thousands of you out there that are totally down for a cupcake from a vending machine... clearly this is true or Hostess would be in worse trouble than they are today.

I would just love to see a world where we as people along with the food we consume were treated with the respect we deserve. I like walking into my local cupcake/coffee shoppe, and waiting in line for a smile and a cupcake.

Maybe I'm the crazy one.

Be good to each other!

♥ Tawny

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